George Carlin: Life Is Worth Losing - English Transcript Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. [masturbation gestures] It doesnt mean a fucking thing. You have no right to complain. George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. 'Look at me, I'm so happy and successful and loved!'
"A transcript of George Carlin talking about Social Media" And so, with all of this in mind, folks, I offer you my revised list of the Two Commandments: THOU SHALT KEEP THY RELIGION TO THYSELF! George Carlin: In football, the object is for the quarterback, otherwise known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by . All rights reserved. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. 0000003901 00000 n
As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! Clearly he's preparing us for something (LAUGHS). It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. Personally, I think we still need to hoist our fannies perpendicular and hike ourselves to the ballet box for all elections. They own all the important land. Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. And the worst part is that social media has become a platform for outrage and self-righteousness. THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. 0000000716 00000 n
Not in the abstract they don't. George has been quoted as calling this his favourite HBO special of them all due to its continuous flow-on nature and high standard of writing. [187 0 R 188 0 R 189 0 R 190 0 R 191 0 R 192 0 R 193 0 R] But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. They speak of course with great caution, because they must take care not to actually say anything. Incidentally, another way of expressing this sentiment is to say we're sending our young men and women to places the average American can't find on the map. To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. startxref George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(English Language and Literature Commons)/Rect[137.2383 212.4906 328.3613 224.2094]/StructParent 5/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. 0000003180 00000 n
endobj I'm so interesting, I'm so important!'. 0000082419 00000 n
<>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. m o n t c l a i r . And let's not forget about YouTube.
George Carlin: Dumb Americans - The Burning Platform The late George Carlin was a genius with words, a deft dasher of conventional logic, and a master observer (and master-baiter!) The planet is fine. We're so obsessed with ourselves and our own little worlds that we can't even have a real conversation or a meaningful interaction with someone without checking our phones every five minutes. CHALLENGES! <> As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you, the only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im going to have a little something to show for it folks. I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. They don't fall out of the sky. https://ad.style/. You caused the problem. I have a problem with the Ten Commandments. THUS FAR, HE HASN'T RESPONDED. POLITICIAN:SERVING THE NATION. People like to twist that around, I know. It's a big club, and you ain't in it. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. of American cultural paradoxes. Sure, there's some good stuff on there, but it's mostly just people filming themselves doing stupid things and hoping to go viral. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. And that certain sign that things are closing in: POLITICIAN:WHATEVER HAPPENED TO INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY (LAUGHS). He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. Moses could have carried them down the hill in his pocket. `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> A friend is someone you can count on. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. And you don't want to spend your real life chasing after digital validation.". 0000002288 00000 n
Juno3127 10 years ago You couldn't be more wrong. If you have selfish ignorant citizens If you have selfish ignorant citizens, youre going to get selfish ignorant leaders. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. 187 0 obj However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people and they get into office and screw everything up, well, you are responsible for what they have done. [FINAL NOTE: If you want to dig deeper into Carlins brilliant mind vis--vis comments on politicians and the doublespeak they are prone to use, check out The Consultation Institutes George Carlin on the language of politics. Everybody complains about politicians. People go on there, they play with the animals, they pet them, they feed them, but they don't get any real interaction. %%EOF Let's all tell each other what we're doing every minute of the day. Follow the link for the full transcript, its worth it, but here are a few choice excerpts: When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. Global Search Search In. They're worried that some day in the future, they might be personally inconvenienced. They own everything. Its a big club, and. 9 minutes; 13,650 views; May 13, 1999 Friends? POLITICIAN:I'M IN PUBLIC SERVICE, I LIKE AMERICA DON'T YOU? The planet has been here four and a half billion years. These are the websites where people go to express themselves, right?
George Carlin Politicians - YouTube And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. So, I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way. Because that's where real communication happens, folks. We've been here, what, a hundred thousand? And that's just sad.". But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment.
And term-limits aint going to do you any good. They dont fall out of the sky. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? Everybody says they suck. No contest. Watch on George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999 Transcribed part of speech begins at 10.33 13 May 1999, National Press Club, Washington DC, USA This is an incomplete transcript made by Raven Developers. this is my tribute and way of promoting George Carlin's work. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. Recorded on November 5, 2005, Beacon Theater, New York City, New York. George Carlin: I'm in Hollywood, Los Angeles. xref In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. Look them in the eye, shake their hand, and share your thoughts and feelings in person. George Carlin Discusses 'Silly Putty and Napalm' Aired June 08, 2001 - 21:00 ET. George Carlin: How you doing? You enjoy yourselves; itll be a lot of fun. They're your 'likes'. Well where do people think these politicians come from? 189 0 obj They made questioners out of us and they really didnt have any answers. In this blog post, we'll take a look at some of Carlin's most famous quotes on government. Besides, environmentalists don't give a shit about the planet. This is what we have to offer. Beep Boop, this was generated by by ChatGPT. It's like they're saying, 'Look at me, look at me! Search. 4 0 obj People are stupid because, well, people are stupid. "Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. 192 0 obj Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. POLITICIAN:I ADVISED HIM THAT I HAD MADE A JUDGMENT. Transcribed part of speech begins at 10.33, 13 May 1999, National Press Club, Washington DC, USA. Let's get started! Maher was raised a Catholic (but has a Jewish mother). You dont. Updated on May 30, 2018. Thats against their interests. Nobody seems to care. Vodafone Ad. Do you? Where you calling from today? Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming!
Quote by George Carlin: "Now, there's one thing you might have noticed Something is definitely wrong. From Life Is Worth Losing. As long he included one additional commandment: Genius is the ultimate source of music knowledge, created by scholars like you who share facts and insight about the songs and artists they love. But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. Shut the fuck up!
TOP 25 QUOTES BY GEORGE CARLIN (of 976) | A-Z Quotes George Carlin interview from 1989 | The Tapes Archive Podcast They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. You got people spouting their opinions left and right, like they're some kind of expert on the subject. Web. His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. endobj Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. Difference. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? Not in the abstract they don't. And secondly, I dont vote because I believe if you vote you have no right to complain.
George Carlin The Planet Is Fine transcript | iComedyTV.com Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 54 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves. They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. Nothing wrong with the planet. George Carlin on Voting Transcript Now there's one thing you might have noticed i don't complain about: politicians. They dont want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking.
George Carlin on the language of politics - YouTube Quote by George Carlin: "But there's a reason. There - Goodreads The truth is, obedience and respect should not be granted automatically. endobj <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Look, I'm not against technology or communication. The table has tilted folks.
It's a Big Club, and You Ain't in It: George Carlin as Social and 185 0 obj trailer Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! OR: I WAS QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT. That's a big activity here in Washington! <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . You got people posting pictures of their food, their pets, their vacations. So, that I can continue my work in Government. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? A lot of that goes on: QUESTION:SENATOR, HAVE YOU SOLVED THAT PROBLEM?POLITICIAN:WELL, WE'RE MOVING FORWARD ON THAT. Thank you. xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n endobj Fuck hope. We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. I just wanna put this thing behind me and get on with my life (CLAPS, LAUGHS). 184 0 obj They don't get any real human contact. Unless we think of some way to fight back. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? So put down your phone, step away from the computer, and go out into the world. _S@bZ&j{|pQGB0qw_rm+eUr!:J9d j9mLJRL Q3PUn\#MuRJ\ *B6B6x I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. endobj 0000002011 00000 n
George Carlin Scripts And besides, all of these sites, they're just an illusion. You enjoy yourselves. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. Every time. Theyre not interested in that. Bruce Lee was raised Catholic and Buddhist. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. 0000002803 00000 n
I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. They want obedient workers. Yes, all the words are quite impolite. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. Likethe public. But here's the thing, folks. Well, we know what they want. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. George Carlin Politicians : Choosing Life or Death in Capitalist America.. George Carlin Politicians youtu.be. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright . Off-course no politician would admit to such a lowly station as working in Government. I have my ideas. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE.
George Carlin (1937-2008): Legendary Comedian Challenged Status Quo He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. But marital fidelity is a good idea, so I suggest we keep the idea and call this commandment "Thou shalt not be unfaithful." THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Transcript. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. He missed this one. Thats a nice campaign slogan for somebody: The public sucks! Maybe something else sucks around here like: THE PUBLIC. Your email address will not be published. They should be earned. Well off-course not only is it possible its inevitable and thats when he's at his very best and that's when he trots out the really good stuff. People trying to make the world save for their Volvos. Use section headers above different song parts like [Verse], [Chorus], etc. ', Illustrator of the Year, British Book Awards - 2018, Tina Fey: 'Only in comedy is an obedient white girl from the suburbs a diversity candidate', Kennedy Center Mark Twain Award - 2010, Sacha Baron Cohen: 'Just think what Goebbels might have done with Facebook', Anti Defamation League Leadership Award - 2019, Greta Thunberg: 'How dare you', UN Climate Action Summit - 2019, Charlie Munger: 'The Psychology of Human Misjudgment', Harvard University - 1995, Lawrence O'Donnell: 'The original sin of this country is that we invaders shot and murdered our way across the land killing every Native American that we could', The Last Word, 'Dakota' - 2016. Two reasons. Nobody cares what you had for breakfast, or what your cat did, or what your opinion is on the latest political scandal. It's all just noise. endobj It's always the whole thing. For added emotional impact sons and daughters can always be substituted for men and women and so I think we can sum this up. They say, Well, if you dont vote you have no right to complain. But wheres the logic in that? And there you have it, a transcript of George Carlin's take on social media. As I say, they're my work, they're my . ,G0p%:::400-: @%L`n((lax@\0eF,q] \ .P+4 d3;P hnN*S fxsH>XDAA#beae:i5rY3h11(31013a_p_&]37CD\&k2N@TD}. That somehow we're gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball that's just a-floatin' around the sun? What's with all the selfies? [5] And another one: The Wealthy the REAL owners! Yeah, right. They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. If you have selfish, ignorant citizensif you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gunna get selfish, ignorant leaders. But theres a reason. Then share it far and wide with the little green button. We're addicted to the attention, the likes, the validation. You have no choice! Everybody complains about politicians. See they don't DECIDE; they DETERMINE. 190 0 obj They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. This is what we have to offer. They dont fall out of the sky. I think I have done that bit', BAFTA acceptance, Leading Actress - 2019, Axel Scheffler: 'The book wasn't called 'No Room on the Broom! Well, not overnight, you cant see the sun at night. While breaking down these claims on political correctness, Carlin implements his own set of values. And the more noise there is, the harder it is to hear anything worth listening to. Now, in the interest of logicsomething religion has a really hard time withI'm going to skip around the list a little bit: THOU SHALT NOT STEAL. We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. Everyone experiences pain, of course. Most of the images you will find here are available for license or purchase. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. (LAUGHS). An INITIATIVE is an idea that isn't going anywhere! Londons Heathrow Airport, November 7, 2018. This is not good work. WHEN THE HEARINGS HAVE CONCLUDED, I WILL MAKE A JUDGMENT OR I MIGHT MAKE AN ASSESSMENT. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. It's like a bunch of robots pretending to be human. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) 188 0 obj Forget the politicians.
[Brain Droppings] | C-SPAN.org Speakola is a labour of love and Id be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate tectonics, continental drift, solar flares, sun spots, magnetic storms, the magnetic reversal of the poleshundreds of thousands of years of bombardment by comets and asteroids and meteors, worlwide floods, tidal waves, worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, recurring ice agesAnd we think some plastic bags, and some aluminum cans are going to make a difference? "No child left behind. You know, those posts that pretend to be modest, but really they're just a way of showing off. I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. I dont vote. Marc Allan: Good, thanks for calling. A friend is someone who will come over and help you move. [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. What a great idea. You have OWNERS! Politicians have traditionally hidden behind three things, the flag, the Bible and children. Now having somewhat successfully established my Press credentials and because you and I have at-least one thing in common which is that all of us deal with language all the time, I thought it might be nice today for me to come to you with some of my language complaints, certainly not to blame them on you, although off-course youre implicated. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. Theyll get it. If you want to make a difference in the world, if you want to connect with people in a meaningful way, put down the phone, step away from the computer, and go have a real conversation with someone. x\}_nK '!oF+$SW9E fX{]YTUOm9qhSO+_7L|*kqyHUwor}=qgw;WnrG7no8G*w6a2Uq
K|CQWO_nT]}wbvASBT=tE.t6C}qC)onmg2uAWq|9xLSg Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Religion. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics; one newspaper called Carlin "the dean of counterculture comedians". endobj [wptabtitle]Blog[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][/wptabcontent] He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1].